The non canonical (and frankly ridiculous) adventures of Lord Shaxx

first a no context sentence, “I would be a talkative nightlight”, done by yours truly

now lets talk of the mighty tale of how Shaxx causally headbutted a nova-bomb away

Mech-1 (basically Toland no.2)Today at 11:14 AM

so on this faithful day, an apprentice guardian was working on her nova bomb control, for she was notorious for her lack of proficiency in void light. upon releasing yet another nova bomb this one had strayed towards Shaxx of which causally headbutted said bomb away as if it was a fly. this being much to Ikora’s amusement.

Mech-1 (basically Toland no.2)Today at 12:57 PM

Next I shall retell the legend of the super headbutter Shaxx (but younger)

So on this faithful day Shaxx, (but younger) was somehow in a game of crucible (ignores the paradox) in the game many supers were pulled yet not one touch the yet to be lord Shaxx as he would be crowned the title after the game, now since Shaxx in this same had not died once, killed 37 people and no others got a single kill Shaxx was awarded a new gold tier medal known as the lord medal of which he took as his title.

now in my multitasking ability I shall tell of Shaxx inventing the 20 meter pacer test

Mech-1 (basically Toland no.2)Today at 1:00 PM

so due to Lord Shaxx’s godliness he came to our world and saw the lack of ghost worthy people, to compensate for this Shaxx created a quick test of skill where one would listen to this The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start. then they would do a quick workout

Mech-1 (basically Toland no.2)Today at 2:07 PM

in the battle of the twilight gap Shaxx alone stood facing the hordes of fallen

upon which with his might helmet headbutted into the entire fallen race as one, in the incredible display of power one of Shaxx’s horns fell off

and the fallen were never the same

AND NEITHER THE READERS

AND NOW THAT CRIMSON DAY IS UPON US
I shall tell of Shaxx admitting he is profusely depressed and is making people play crucible to cope

Mech-1 (Toland no.2)Yesterday at 11:46 AM

LET US CONTINUE ON THE NON CANONICAL (AND FRANKLY RIDICULOUS) ADVENTURE OF, (breaths) SSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAXXXXXXXXXXXX

Mech-1 (Toland no.2)Yesterday at 11:48 AM

so now i shall tell the tale of how Shaxx fought shaggy and won

so on this day Shaggy was causally was sucking the souls out of people when out of the blue OUR GREAT LORD SHAXX poped into existence, of which he lowers his head and charges Shaggy killing him instantly with a massive headbutt, breaking the universe into two

and now, keep your friends close and your ramen tickets closer, this is mech-1 writing more random things

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it doesn’t get stranger than this mate

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I don’t know a way to describe how strange this is

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it was updated with the new and improved shaggy fight

Still don’t know what to say, but it is funny

“THIS IS AMAZING” -Shaxx reading about himself

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Funny, and considering that if you pick up the bow from Crimson Days Shaxx will propose. (Check the lore entry on it)

what about the time Shaxx sang Toland back to life (i here it was very embarrassing for him) so that he can hold the right to be the last person in existence before the black edge consumed the universe, or am i being confused

no Calus is actually an anagram for shaxx if you replace the CLU with SHXX